Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Dear Psycho Dance Mom...

I apologize that it has taken me 2 weeks to write you this letter. Really you have been on my mind.

I am writing this letter to apologize for laughing hysterically in your face when you yelled at me in the dressing room of our daughter's dance recital.
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First it was your passive aggressive comments, and then your blatant bitchy yelling that got me. Really, I am sorry for laughing back at you.

At the time it was really all I could do.

Sure, I could've jumped on you all "8 month pregnant hormonal lady crazy" and taken your ass down and beaten you up and made you my bitch.

But no.

I just laughed. Because it was quite humorous.

Really, weren't we all just in the same boat? Trying to get our 100's of girls dressed and ready for the big recital. Aren't we doing this because they are just so darn cute and so they can have some fun at the age of FOUR! Isn't it really just for the kids to have fun? We are just pawns in this silly recital, child make-up game? Right? Why take it so seriously.

Now, I do realize that I laid my purse AND god forbid sat my daughter down exactly 5 inches from "YOUR" chair - and somehow this impeded on your day so much that you chose to get the vapors and yell at us.

But you know, after 3 days of listening to you yell at your precious FOUR YEAR OLDS about how they were doing nothing right, I actually appreciated you yelling at me and NOT THEM for once...and it kind of made me smile.
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We all just try to do the best by our children - even when they are wearing blue eyeshadow. I understand that this whole 4 nights of dance craziness evidently stresses you out beyond repair. I feel your pain.

I promise not to laugh at you next year. I will bring the vodka.
amen.
xoxo,t

6 comments:

Amanda M. said...

I just read a similar post on another awesome blog:
http://afostermamaslife.blogspot.com/2009/04/dear-stage-mom.html

Your post and hers are HILARIOUS!

Kristi Pohl said...

I hear pageant moms are even worse...

Heather said...

yikes! the psycho dance mom plague seems to be very, very catchy these days.

not sure wth is wrong with these people? and am i wrong for wanting you to just knock her out? cause i liked that alternative ending that played in my mind.

on a positive note...e and e are absolutely precious!

Melanie said...

wow. she was yelling at the kids? how sad. good for you keeping up your sense of humor. unfortunately, i would be writing my post from jail for smacking her.

Jill R said...

Ick...I feel for those poor children of hers, think of what she's like when they aren't doing something "fun" (and I use that term lightly when speaking of dance recital weekend because I know how stressful it can be when I'M not well prepared).

Do you think she'd take umbrage if you brought a violin, sat down and started playing it through her yelling?

Or better yet, video tape her insanity and mail her a copy with a note enclosed that said "Are we having fun yet? Take a look at yourself as the world sees you"

Bleh.

Anonymous said...

Some people need to get a life, and some shouldn't be around children! Glad you are like me and stand up for your kids even if it's not "pc". The girls look GORGEOUS as always! And yes you could have TOTALLY gotten away with the 8 month hormonal thing LOL!

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