Thursday, December 31, 2009

New Year Still Me...Just Wrinklier


I had prepared a very eloquent post about how awesome I was in 2009 and how awesome my year was and how I use the word awesome like it is still 1985 - back when I was awesome.

But it was all a bunch of bullshit, so I deleted it.

Don't get me wrong, my year was good - I had a baby and all - which is awesome, but I also lost a grandparent and the economy was kind of a downer, and both girls transitioned to new schools and my arms just SUCK compared to Michelle Obama's and she is such a show-off.

I have spent the year trying on clothing at JCrew, and it just looks so much better on her than me. That is like so not awesome.

What I do want to do is look forward to my 42nd year on this planet. Sure, I am hopeful for another 76 years at least, but taking reality into consideration, I know that life IS short. This blog has helped me learn that I don't want to waste it. This blog has brought me links and friends from near and far. This blog has introduced me to people I never would've met otherwise. This blog has opened my eyes, my heart, and my mind.

I have learned that it is okay to not know exactly who I am at 41, and that I can still define myself every day.

I do know that for 2010, I want to be true to myself - to use my blog for only good and not evil, and to be honest and put myself out there and embrace my vulnerability. It's okay not to be perfect - and I have been perfecting that for a very long time.

And I just want to love, accept and forgive more - and focus on the important names I go by - Mother, Wife, Daughter, Sister, Aunt, Friend, Niece, Granddaughter, Neighbor. The rest doesn't matter so much. We are all really the same.

Life is too short - for grudges and hate and discrimination and stupidity. And I can be a real bitch, so thank you for still liking me.

xoxo,t

8 comments:

Stacey said...

Wishing you only the best in 2010 my dear friend...

Amanda said...

tracy! thanks for being vulnerable. i love it! :)

Kristi Pohl said...

You are such a beautiful friend, I am lucky to have you in my life.

Jaci said...

Happy New Year! Here's to a great 2010!

Rachelle said...

Though we haven't met face to face, I think you and your blog are totally awesome. :o) Happy New Year!

Melanie said...

Love ya & love your blog Tracy! Wishing you a wonderful 2010 & thank you for sharing your ups & downs so honestly here & with such awesome wit! You have a lovely family & I am glad that our paths crossed thanks to MJC!

Michelle said...

I DO like you.

I forget that we didn't know each other before blogging. :) xoxo, m

The Planet Pink said...

Isn't it funny how much you can feel like you KNOW a person, just through the internet? Wishing you a blessed and happy 2010 my dear!

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